Saturday, 18 August 2012

I hate my pride... it's like a leech!

I hate my pride, it's like a leech! It wastes my resources and prohibits me from being a loyal subject of the kingdom... how frustrating. Lord! You stock gold refined by fire, white clothes, eye ointment and produce a 9-flavour fruit, I need new tweezers! Do you sell them?

19.8.2012 -- Sunday

What I really mean is.... if I have The Holy Spirit and all the above things He sells -- with righteousness I'll clothe me and stop being deceived to think of myself as more than I am; with trials and troubles and struggles He will refine me like gold until all the impurities are sifted out; with eye ointment He will help me see His Sovereignty and His plans and His heart and stomach those whom I usually walk away repulsively from; and a 9-flavour fruit of the Holy Spirit including love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentle-ness, self-control; then I will indeed be able to put that pride under control and be empowered with His tweezers to pinch it out.

You evil cockroach of a leech, don't you know I'm already dead and buried? I'm gonna leave you nailed to the cross until you die off withered. *disgusted*

I like studying with The Lord

I like studying economics with The Lord, He teaches me dynamically and we chat about managing The Kingdom as we learn the economic concepts

Friday, 17 August 2012

so God asked ...

you used to believe in me like that, why don't you pray like that anymore?
you used to pray to me and expect a miracle -- a supernatural answer from me. Why don't you pray for a train anymore? Why don't you pray for a parking lot anymore?
you used to believe in me like that, why don't you pray expecting me to do something anymore? why do you rather rely on your own strength to get to the train on time?

do you believe -- that I am the same God that has raised people from death?
you know in your mind, but do you really believe -- that I am the same God who has raised people from death?
Do you believe that I am this big, or something else smaller?

Lord, I believe -- that You are someOne this big. *sigh* why do you test me? But there may be future times in my life, that i may have to live out this belief as I'm being tested by circumstance -- that indeed you are someOne, not someThing, and that you are indeed this big.


There are some who believe in God, and then there are some who believe in the Living God.
Immediately hearing this phrase, i went and got dressed and bowed to The Almighty Always. Surely You are the Living God.

David_Pawson_The_Kingdom-_1._The_Kingdom_of_God




18.8.2012 Saturday, pondering about Chartis abt going back to work in SG. And about preaching God's Word to the people in SG in rounds at church, and about City Harvest and how the people in there are trapped in Baal worship and worship of Moleck and if the only way to get these people out is to infiltrate. And how the Presbyterian church is heavy in its preaching... when the Holy Spirit is not there/when His work is limited.


Tuesday, 14 August 2012

Humans shut this church down but God didn't shut down this church

One of the greatest pains in my life is my time in GNLC... how we did every single thing we could, tried all sorts of ways to increase numbers, overworked and totally got burnt out -- the entire family, along with the Gohs. 

We see people come and go, we see friends turn away and abandon the vision, one of our greatest supporters who helped us get the TR/PR left the church... and my immaturity and not able to recognise their spiritual state and fortify them causing people like Maggie/Jason to leave God although once tasted the natural springs... or did they?

I always rebuke myself, asking what went wrong? Frustrated, I asked -- can quality be measured in quantity? Can God's people be measured in numbers' worth week after week?

Then the church got shut down because numbers did not increase quick enough to become a fully strong church in that limited time frame they gave and the English congregation and head office did not have any finance to support it.

It is one of my greatest pains and regrets... but today, from pawson's talk of revelation, the Holy Spirit talked to me... saying, just as in the days of John the apostle and what he saw in Revelation -- that little church with a few numbers struggling just to make it through, John saw from heaven's view that this church was one of the churches with the most potential amongst the seven that he used to travelling around preaching to. The church of Philadelphia that John the Apostle ministered to was a church of just a handful of people, of little strength, but it was a church that had the key to the open door set before it that God is not going to shut and no one is able to shut.

Somehow, it felt like that was a descriptor of what GNLC was, and GNLC  was a church that humans shut it down because in their eyes it was not performing well. But The Holy Spirit said "But." He said -- "But I didn't shut this church down." He was saying -- "Don't you see? Don't you see I have not shut this church down? Don't you see that I have merely taken away the yoke of human hands that have so burdened you so that now you can serve me and me only?" And that we will have no more of these reporting of numbers each week and the work of quality He had started to do in each of us He continues, and that now I too want to be like John the Apostle and go around churches sharing the message about Him and His righteousness. He made us missionaries when the world thought that we were not good pastors located in a static church building. He sends us and tells us to "go!" and make disciples in His Name.

If this is not a miracle, I don't know what it is...

Therefore, to anyone reading this who have also or perhaps are currently struggling -- here is your fortification -- "Don't you know that I have not shut this church down? So go. And make disciples in My Name." Thus says the Lord your God. "And surely I am with you always -- until the very end of the age."



~Listening to David Pawson's series on The Holy Spirit -- 16 David_Pawson_The_Holy_Spirit-_In_the_Book_of_Revelation

Friday, 10 August 2012

Filled to overflowing - Let me speak!!

10.8.2012
Filled to overflowing... let me speak!!!!!!!!!! If you don't let me speak I'm just gonna yell it out, and the stones will start dancing and people are gonna think I'm drunk....
 A few weeks ago the Holy Spirit filled me.. you just knew it -- your heart is absolutely guilt free. And then on 7/8/2012 -- God renewed my mission -- by watching a twig bunch that reminded me of the burning bush, and by assuring me of His presence by a pillar of clouds.
Today, as I listened to Pawson about the Holy Spirit in Acts part 1, realised that the Holy Spirit filled me to a point... in my heart, He is so full, so absolutely in control there is such an urge to open my mouth and just speak and preach God's word right now at 10.32pm and I just want to speak!!!! And the He in me is just about to burst out to the point that I reckon if He doesn't let me speak soon I'm just gonna yell it out, and the stones will start praising God and dancing and I'm gonna go around and people are gonna think I'm absolutely drunk, dancing, singing and preaching God's word that it will be so nonsensical to people.
I finally understood what that section in acts meant.

Wait -- is not sit down and do nothing... praise God! Phew! What a relief! Wait is actively preparing everything else so that when the Holy Spirit comes with His Ruach, we may be ready to take off like eagles do waiting for the mighty wind. This means that for us who are waiting, we may be getting theologically trained and sound with the understanding of The Holy One in all His Wisdom... This means that when we're waiting for a future partner we're doing everything we possibly can to prepare ourselves so that we will be ready for coming together in Christ when we the time has come.
 
Praise God that He did not pay attention to the number of theological degrees we have acquired before choosing to use us. This means that everyday people like us can be used by God to convey that breath of fresh air to a stagnating church. When everyday people like us who have not been through training get up from the pews and preach, people take notice because we have not been trained, how can we speak like that?



Praise God for not having  to be anybody special to do so, praise God for not having to be a pastor before being allowed to preach to His people -- He has called every one of us individually, and because He is creative He teaches and uses us in a way that we bring with us our own personalities and it fits, in that way we will preach! Praise God for variety.

Ruach Elohim - The Spirit of God

Wednesday, 8 August 2012

What to talk about - part I

Thought I might elaborate here each time I find out something more
======================================================


Work
"I've got dynamite in me"
"When I've lost hope in ministry."

- The moment that a human says 'I'm just a man' and get all depressed, then a man is all he will ever be.
- Elijah did that, and God says -- nope, I got 7000 more priests. And God only used Elijah once for something big later, and then told Elijah to get his replacement Elisha to replace him. "If you want to be just a man, then 'just-a-man' you will be." for you did not acknowledge that I was with you when I went with you, and you did not see me as a partner and your CEO who gives the directions and accomplishes the work. You think you're doing this work all alone for me, planning the strategic direction, setting the focus, the credentials, the authority, the reputation.... and then you get all depressed when things don't work out the way you want it to work out. You want everything planned out before you go.

But in truth, I was and still am the one who is working for Me, and for me alone (my will). Always have been. I choose the disciples. I choose the strategy. I choose the method. I choose the timeframe. I choose the direction. I choose the mission field. I prepare the finance. I prepare the hearts of the people to receive my will. I choose those whom my wrath will land upon. I AM he. For not by power nor by talents will you accomplish work, but by my Spirit. The moment  you forget that, then a man you shall be, and a man is all you will be, for when you stepped backwards, I became displeased with you and don't like you/ don't like to work with you no more. So I left, and so came the end to your ministry.

I don't want someone with a lot of talents. I want someone who is willing to use all the talents he has for me.
I don't want someone with a lot of plans. I want someone who has a big heart to fill my plans with.
I don't want someone who is really good at talking. I want someone who regardless of how good he is at talking of his own accord will surrender that will to me so that I can talk using his mouth to assure the people up with my word.
I don't want someone who is very capable. I want someone who is capable of making himself nothing so that I can show that I am his everything.
I don't want someone smart. I want someone smart enough to let me use his head for my purposes completely.
I don't want someone who honours himself. I want someone who honours the saviour who lives in him.
I don't want someone proud. I want someone humble enough to accept my direction and sail with my mighty gale directing his direction. And I will open up the opportunities. And I will provide the inspiration, that gale of fresh air in a stagnating country land. And I alone will be responsible for the outcomes. And my word will not come back empty handed.
I don't want someone broken to pieces like a fallen mirror. I want to reassemble and complete him so that he can contain my Spirit until he overflows to those around him. The bruised reed I will not snap. The dimming lamp I will not blow out.
I don't want someone who walks by sight. I want someone who is willing to shut his eyes and just trust my voice -- I the Lord alone will be his eyes.
I love my sheep, and my sheep know my voice. They will not listen to the stranger for they do not know their voice. I am the good shepherd, and I lay down my life for my sheep. And that sheep is you.



If you are prepared to seek my face once again, then wait! until I fill you with my Holy Spirit again and you are enabled to work again. In the mean time, be sort yourself out so that it is not about you all the time. Get your ears cleaned out, ready to hear, and get your eye ointment that you may be able to see what plans I have rather than being caught up in your petty little world with your little fantasies and power games. Train up your gentleness that you may care for my heart's desires. Train up your humbleness so that I can use you as a vessel. Train up your knowledge of my Word so that I can use your mouth to say anything I like, like someone bringing out the old and the new treasures from the treasure box. So that when I come and fill you and want you to go do some work for me, you are ready, like an eagle wait for the wind.

- 你看了人,你就失望了吗?你看我吧!为什么看那能动摇的人呢?
- Not only choose your treasure, but also choose your anchor
- Tie faith to the sight and the sight will go up and down with your sight. Tie your sight to your faith, and your faith to the unshakable God Jehova, then your sight will be stable like your faith. Your faith frequently takes one step before your feet, do you know what i mean?

- Wait. Don't rush God's work, like a farmer waits for his crops. But wait is an active thing -- farmer doesn't just plant and wait for the crops. He plants, prunes, rids of the weeds, rids of the small fruits so that the rest of the fruits have more nutrients to grow, puts nets on the fruits so that the bugs and birds don't get to them first, pesticides the fruits (come fort) to prevent the bugs from being able to eat them.

==================================================

Salvation

"Crucifixion -- a shared righteousness from God exchanged"

Making Silicone Moulds cobblestones to sell, and recalled Ming saying last sat ( 4.8.12 4th yr anniv @ suncorp) how he called some christian religious advocate 神經病 for calling the gays to be chased out of melbourne. Then he asked if it were us, what would we say to them? And I replied -- i'd tell them you're a sinner, and so am I, and we both need salvation. A natural response, no doubt, and quite a real one, which is saying yea we all need God's grace and no matter how little the sin, when we sin, we equally can't get to heaven. I didn't mean it as a condemnation, but Ming twarted his face in disgust like he really disliked the idea of being called a sinner. And yet he is thinking about being baptised because some pastor asked him to. Then, I wondered if he didn't like the idea of being called a sinner, and didn't humbly acknowledge that that is the state that he is in, what, exactly, is he hoping to get washed away in baptism??? The baptism would be utterly useless to him, because he has not yet repented!

Then today i was thinking, unless you are a born again Christian, your attitude towards sin against God is really different. The average human thinks of sin as a crime against themselves or another human. But sin is against God and people don't realise that even if you have committed no crime you would have still sinned against God -- because the greatest sin is to not believe in Jesus -- that's the worse sin one can ever commit against God in His eyes (read John 3, near 16).

Then, thinking about this, i realised the message that we Christians gotta bring to the world, and it is not a message of condemnation --- it goes like this --- People hate being called a sinner because firstly, they might really know that yes there is indeed something wrong in me, but too proud to admit it, because that would mean he would have to humble down and admit wrong. Secondly, you get the ones who are not proud but they are worried that if they admit it that the world will laugh at them and they will be somehow shamed and made to face all the consequences of their sinful act or the act of their confession. But here is what we say---

you know? you're a sinner, but you don't have to be! You know your life is all messed up but it doesn't need to be all entangled. You know, your life is a road full of portholes and you walk in them, and no matter where you turn to walk you step and trip from them and you get angry and frustrated cuz it keeps trippin' you up, but it doesn't have to be like that -- all those holes can be filled up flat, no more trippin'. You know your path is all winding and crooked and you're confused and messed up by all these guilt bearing actions in your life, but it can be straightened out -- this is the good news! A news of repentance --

that if you come with your sins exactly the way you are and you call on Jesus Christ the Son for help and forgiveness, and believe on Him, He is faithful and just and He will take all those sins away and He will remember them no more! He will remember them no more! For He has shouldered the wage of sin on the cross for you and proved victorious by His resurrection, hence your heart can be washed guilt free. O what liberty!

O what freedom! To be free from the snares of it all. And the Holy Spirit will comfort you -- the word comfort is a strong word that comes from to "come fort" in a battle -- to strengthen the inner man within you that you may be fortified to face whatever comes your way. And having a guilt free conscience is not enough, you need God's righteousness that He exchanges with you in place of your sin, and like big furry white cloak He will wrap and clothe you in it, so that inside-out you start to live a righteous life which will truly fortify you so that even if there are any consequences remaining from your past sinful acts, that you will be able to resolve them and solve or deal with them now, with a clear knowledge deep down that you have been forgiven and that it will condemn you no more.

Hallelujah -- Glory be to God, for great things He has done! Who yielded His life an atonement for sin, and opened the life gate that all may come in.
And I will be able to sleep tonight. Jesus says -- "my peace I leave you. And my peace is not like the peace of the world. True assuring peace I give you through my righteousness that you can hide yourself under that cloak and not sizzle to death when you face a Me who art Holy and absolutely right and just, for I will remember your sins no more." And able to face God, you can now face those you have offended, and most of all, you can face yourself.

"My peace I leave you, and it is not a peace of the world. It is true peace." Says Jesus your Christ.


The crooked straight, the rough places plain. Every valley will be exalted. Straighten your paths and prepare the way for the Lord (Isaiah, John the baptist)

==================================================
Sexual Immorality, The Holy Spirit, Law, License, Death and buried

"Attention, Confidence, Assurance, Release, Escape, Comfort, Wanted." -- what the Bible says about confidence, sex, prostitution and why people engage in it. -- King david's case. It's a snare. one thing leads to another... oh but the pleasures of sin! Overcome? in the Holy Spirit. God wants you -- and He wants you holy. Such were some of you.







==================================================
==================================================
==================================================
==================================================
==================================================
==================================================
==================================================
==================================================
==================================================
==================================================

==================================================
We can speak of the God head, like

"One Triune God" and what this implies for us.
"The Holy Spirit -- Just like Jesus"
"Worship? or Worth-ship?"
"Oreo cookies and baptism."
"The Christian life -- stop pushing the boat, let's go sailing."

We can speak of the "Crucifixion -- a shared righteousness from God exchanged"
"Salvaged -- a mercy from God."
"Deo Excelsis in Gloria"

We can speak of creation, like "Hmmm... yea, just the right size."
"Christ the Word, alive."

Or about prayer, like
"Prayer To the Father, In the Son, Through The Holy Spirit."
"When you pray, say 'we'."
"Prayer in the Arena."


We can speak of impactful topics and topics about life like
"Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more"
"Mad with thirst"
"Encamped -- and armed." -- know you are in the army
"Attention, Confidence, Assurance, Release, Escape, Comfort, Wanted." -- what the Bible says about confidence, sex, prostitution and why people engage in it. -- King david's case. It's a snare. one thing leads to another... oh but the pleasures of sin! Overcome? in the Holy Spirit. God wants you -- and He wants you holy. Such were some of you.


Or we can speak about hell with topics like
"Hell is a beautiful place", and "Hell -- a rubbish bin"
"The wedding banquet: Chucked out of the lobby of heaven straight into hell"
"Tourism business in heaven -- the tourists and the backpackers"


We can speak about Work, both your usual daily work, and spiritual

ministry work, including topics like
"The Holy Spirit -- my CEO"
"Kingdom business ... on Earth."
"Come fort"
"my Identity."
"When I've lost hope in ministry."
"Comfort ye my people."
"Economics -- God's idea of a worthwhile investment."
"The Kingdom -- a centrally planned market economy."
"We can go in a motorbike or in a car."


------------------
9.8.2012 Thurs

A non-exhaustive list of sharing topics, as per requested by Jono today....
I wonder what He wants to tell His people....


Part I, non-exhaustive because we haven't even covered relationships

======================================================
We can speak of the God head, like

"One Triune God" and what this implies for us.
"The Holy Spirit -- Just like Jesus"
"Worship? or Worth-ship?"
"Oreo cookies and baptism."
"The Christian life -- stop pushing the boat, let's go sailing."

We can speak of the "Crucifixion -- a shared righteousness from

God exchanged"
"Salvaged -- a mercy from God."
"Deo Excelsis in Gloria"

We can speak of creation, like "Hmmm... yea, just the right size."
"Christ the Word, alive."

Or about prayer, like
"Prayer To the Father, In the Son, Through The Holy Spirit."
"When you pray, say 'we'."
"Prayer in the Arena."


We can speak of impactful topics like
"Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more"
"Mad with thirst"
"Encamped -- and armed." -- know you are in the army
"I've got dynamite in me"


Or we can speak about hell with topics like
"Hell is a beautiful place", and "Hell -- a rubbish bin"
"The wedding banquet: Chucked out of the lobby of heaven straight into hell"
"Tourism business in heaven -- the tourists and the backpackers"
"Attention, Confidence, Assurance, Release, Escape, Comfort, Wanted." -- what the Bible says about confidence, sex, prostitution and why people engage in it. -- King david's case. It's a snare. one thing leads to another... oh but the pleasures of sin! Overcome? in the Holy Spirit. God wants you -- and He wants you holy. Such were some of you.




We can speak about Work, both your usual daily work, and spiritual

ministry work, including topics like
"The Holy Spirit -- my CEO"
"Kingdom business ... on Earth."
"Come fort"
"my Identity."
"When I've lost hope in ministry."
"Comfort ye my people."
"Economics -- God's idea of a worthwhile investment."
"The Kingdom -- a centrally planned market economy."
"We can go in a motorbike or in a car."

Motor bikes, Clay Jar, Dynamite

I was driving on the way home, and thought about how although I tried to recruit someone to work with me, God did not call them. So I was thinking about Eunice and how she said we could in pairs pair up in fours as a team, doing a variety of ministry. And I thought --- Even if we only had a motorcycle and not a car, we could still go, cuz we're either a two or a four. Even though I don't have a team, I'll always be at least a two, and even if all we had was a motorbike (cuz u wont need a car for only two ppl), we could still go, cuz we have the option of being a four or a two -- me and God. It's a beautiful thing ^_^
though i'm only clay, I got dynamite in me...

______

Yesterday....

I want to have God as my employer and The Holy Spirit as my CEO, don't mind a bit of spontaneity or jumping out of my comfort zone