One of the greatest pains in my life is my time in GNLC... how we did every single thing we could, tried all sorts of ways to increase numbers, overworked and totally got burnt out -- the entire family, along with the Gohs.
We see people come and go, we see friends turn away and abandon the vision, one of our greatest supporters who helped us get the TR/PR left the church... and my immaturity and not able to recognise their spiritual state and fortify them causing people like Maggie/Jason to leave God although once tasted the natural springs... or did they?
I always rebuke myself, asking what went wrong? Frustrated, I asked -- can quality be measured in quantity? Can God's people be measured in numbers' worth week after week?
Then the church got shut down because numbers did not increase quick enough to become a fully strong church in that limited time frame they gave and the English congregation and head office did not have any finance to support it.
It is one of my greatest pains and regrets... but today, from pawson's talk of revelation, the Holy Spirit talked to me... saying, just as in the days of John the apostle and what he saw in Revelation -- that little church with a few numbers struggling just to make it through, John saw from heaven's view that this church was one of the churches with the most potential amongst the seven that he used to travelling around preaching to. The church of Philadelphia that John the Apostle ministered to was a church of just a handful of people, of little strength, but it was a church that had the key to the open door set before it that God is not going to shut and no one is able to shut.
Somehow, it felt like that was a descriptor of what GNLC was, and GNLC was a church that humans shut it down because in their eyes it was not performing well. But The Holy Spirit said "But." He said -- "But I didn't shut this church down." He was saying -- "Don't you see? Don't you see I have not shut this church down? Don't you see that I have merely taken away the yoke of human hands that have so burdened you so that now you can serve me and me only?" And that we will have no more of these reporting of numbers each week and the work of quality He had started to do in each of us He continues, and that now I too want to be like John the Apostle and go around churches sharing the message about Him and His righteousness. He made us missionaries when the world thought that we were not good pastors located in a static church building. He sends us and tells us to "go!" and make disciples in His Name.
Somehow, it felt like that was a descriptor of what GNLC was, and GNLC was a church that humans shut it down because in their eyes it was not performing well. But The Holy Spirit said "But." He said -- "But I didn't shut this church down." He was saying -- "Don't you see? Don't you see I have not shut this church down? Don't you see that I have merely taken away the yoke of human hands that have so burdened you so that now you can serve me and me only?" And that we will have no more of these reporting of numbers each week and the work of quality He had started to do in each of us He continues, and that now I too want to be like John the Apostle and go around churches sharing the message about Him and His righteousness. He made us missionaries when the world thought that we were not good pastors located in a static church building. He sends us and tells us to "go!" and make disciples in His Name.
If this is not a miracle, I don't know what it is...
Therefore, to anyone reading this who have also or perhaps are currently struggling -- here is your fortification -- "Don't you know that I have not shut this church down? So go. And make disciples in My Name." Thus says the Lord your God. "And surely I am with you always -- until the very end of the age."
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